/md/ - Murder Drones

Relating to the question about DDs being immune to EMP from last thread, we saw two instances in the show, one at the start where J uses an EMP attack to stun Uzi. This is in a large open space while N and V are fighting some distance away from J and Uzi.
In the second instance Alice uses an amputated EMP weapon to stun N, V and Uzi and capture them, they are in a confined hallway and close together.
It seems like DDs are immune to their own EMP when they fire it, even though it's attached to their body, however they can't be passively insulated against it because then N and V should have been immune to it in the lab.
Therefore I speculate it's an active protection, a DD has to either have time to prepare the defense for themselves or they have to be in the act of firing their EMP weapon to be safe.
Similar to Ns super strength feats or Vs super speed feats, these are things a DD can do when they're focused in on the task but not something they can do reflexively or all the time without thinking about it. It either costs too much energy to do constantly or requires some kind of internal preparation or special circumstances.

>>353748
Maybe less that he forgot and more that he just doesn't care about consistency, he's in it for the one cool scene, and then the next cool scene after that.

>>353678
Damn, that looks sad.

>>353751
>Disassembly Berry
Neato! But that attitude she's giving will require correction also I see Pavo is getting contenders for the title of biggest backplate

My drone keeps getting a Out of Memory error whenever i try to have her build shaders for when she looks at humans, what do?

Guys. What if.. What if Murder Drones but it was like Ted?

>>353756
Nori "the sex haver" Doorman always makes sure to devirgin any human male she sees

>>353754
She’s spending all her processing power on picturing you naked, the trick is to just not wear clothes so she doesn’t have to

>>353743
>Fun Morning Canon/OC Fact: post-canon, Uzi's initial plan for what to do with the invincible vampire army she inherited from the Absolute Solver was to put them on rotating shifts of doing housework (after decades of genocidal slaughter, there was nothing they wanted more than to just do housework again) around the Doorman house.
>This was called off when Nori took it as coming from the assumption that she's incapable of doing it on her own as a bodiless headcrab and no amount of explaining could change her mind.

>>353750
How so?

>>353757
Nori is too stinky to have the sex with humans

>>353763
But they have gasmasks on in cabin fever that's why they could clang Nori

Chickens for Pidge

>>352339
>You lock the door behind you as the two of you enter the workshop. Switch stands rigidly by the door, a scowl on her face, as you pace back and forth. You stop in front of her and cross your arms.
“You might explain to me what the hell was that?”
>Switch doesn’t say anything and glares at you. Oh, this bitch…
“Do you know how much trouble you’re in?! And me too! I’m your handler! How the hell do you think I’m going to explain your behavior?!”
>Switch’s arms start shaking and she bares her teeth. She’s probably gonna pummel you to death but you’re not afraid. In fact, let her do it. You’re so fucking pissed at her that you’ll let her dismember you to prove a point. Whatever it is.
“Oh, so now you’re gonna break all my bones? Do it!”
>Switch closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She opens them and starts walking towards you. You brace for your demise, but it doesn’t come. You cautiously look around and see she’s walking towards the operating table. She raises her fist in the air and slams it down on the table.
>You jump back in surprise. You were expecting her to hit you and not the table. The table crumbles from the force of the punch but she keeps slamming it with her fist. “去你㖿!” She keeps repeating that word, whatever it means, as she absolutely wrecks the table and you just stand there like a deer about to be hit by a car. You want to try and stop her but right now you’re too scared to approach her.
>She stops hitting the table which is now a mangled mess of scrap metal. She stares at it for a moment before she suddenly sits down on the floor. She pulls up her knees and wraps her arms around her legs as she starts sobbing.
>The anger you’re feeling washes away. You’re still angry at her but now you’re worried if she’s gonna start cutting herself open again like last week when she took the drugs. You crouch next to her and put your hand on her shoulder. She raises her head and looks at you with distress. She sniffles but you don’t see digital tears running down her visor. You don’t know what to say to her that wouldn’t make her more angry or sadder so you just nod and smile.
>”我憎呢個地方…” She whispers as she shakes her head. “我憎呢個地方同入面嘅每一個人！” She suddenly yells out and you step back. She stands up and stays in place for a moment before walking towards the little shrine in the corner. She kneels in front of it then places her head on the floor with her hands forward the shrine like she’s saluting a king. She then starts repeating a sentence.
>”往昔所造诸恶业，皆由无始贪嗔痴， 从身语意之所生，一切我今皆忏悔”
>You have no idea what she’s saying but it sounds like some sort of prayer. She repeats it ten times then rises while still kneeling in front of the shrine, staring at it in silence. You approach her as you finally get the courage to speak up.
“Are you gonna tell me what this is all about?”
>Switch doesn’t turn around but she straightens her back. “Few years ago, there was a cult of DDs operating on this planet. They were part of a sect that preached how DDs should…embrace what they are – shameless monsters. Took us some time to find them but eventually we found out where they were hiding. Orders were to go in and capture them to find out more of their cult. Pavo was part of this group. I wasn’t. I was deliberately kept in the dark about the whole thing because they knew that I would just slaughter them all…which I did.”
>”I found out about the whole operation when I stole classified documentation then got into action. I got out before anyone noticed which was also the day the group was being deployed. I got there before them, and I just started slaughtering everything. Their leader…I saved for last. She didn’t die a quick death. When the cavalry arrived all what was left was oil and gore and me.”
>”Pavo started lecturing me about going AWOL, about breaking protocol and whatnot. I told him that he would do the same thing if he wasn’t such a pansy ass goody-good shoes who believes in following orders. He knew I was right about them, but something ticked off in him and he attacked me. We fought but we both survived.”
>Woah. Okay. Well that’s something. Knowing about the war, and her, she had legitimate grievances about such groups existing but going into detail how she admitted to going AWOL is bad. Sure, you disrespected some officers and disobeyed an order or two, but you never thought about abandoning your post.
“Look, I understand what you did but you literally admitted to going AWOL which is like one of the worst things a soldier could commit.”
>Switch turns her head around and looks at you. “Are you seriously taking their side?”
“I’m not on anyone’s side but my own, Switch. Maybe you should have thought of the consequences of what you did but…It’s clear they don’t like you or fear you. You hate it here and…”
>Hmm…the base is in the middle of almost nowhere. Nearest city is about 90 kilometers from here but there’s a forest nearby. What if…
“Hey, how about this? Wanna go outside tomorrow? I don’t know how long you haven’t been in open air after your, um, incident but all I’ve seen you do is just coup yourself up in this base. Just the two of us walking around…”
>What you’re suggesting really sounds like a date. Why’d you have to say it like this? You start to feel embarrassment and start glancing between the floor and Switch like an idiot. She raises an eyebrow as she catches on what you’re thinking but she shrugs and looks back at the shrine. “Alright. Fine. I’d like to be left alone now.”
>You nod as you turn around and walk towards the door as you walk back to your dorm.
>Might as well get ready and cleaned for your ‘date’.

Drones could never win elections without cheating and gerrymandering galactic districts

>>353769
Yes

>>353747
I rather see J simply being out of the EMP's path: we see her raising the EMP cannon high above herself, creating a protective umbrella around herself as the EMP is released as a visible, directed wave. That is, DDs are vulnerable to any EMP weapon, and when they use it themselves, they simply put themselves out of the way.

If N were symbolically a cat and V were symbolically a dog, what breed of dog would V symbolically be?
>Hard Mode: if you say pit bull, specify which breed of pit bull
>Dante Must Die Mode: don't say pit bull

>>353772
V would be an Alsatian.
N would be a ginger tabby.

>>353772
Borzoi

Kissies for Keeter!

>>353774
Is it the high prey drive?

>>353775
It's so nice to see keeter having fun with a new friend!

>>353761
I know Liam's working on this on a contract basis, like a favor for a favor; it's an IC-0n voice actress cartoon, after all.

The Vass
https://x.com/alaki_zezo/status/2050536611004428427

>>353783
The contract is that she has to dress up as a Vickers girl and do t-rex arms whenever Liam does things for her

>>353779
N has been called the golden retriever though?

Powerscalers made molly mog thragg

Rawr!

>>353787
>[That Means I'll Rape You In Dinosaur. Big Smile]

>>353788
Cyn stop possessing the keet.

>>353768
Yeah, Switch really is like a rabid dog. She's certainly useful, but allowing the core team of a dangerous religious organization to escape retribution for her own satisfaction? That's why it's best to keep drones like her in virtual reality. Inc needs to get her mind sorted out.

>>353775
Kek.

>>353783
Seriously? I remember someone writing that Liam was just returning the favor. Well, the contract was like "you help me, I help you," I wanted to emphasize the seriousness.

wait, Uzi has to use the bathroom?
Congrats to the class of 3071 for graduating! 🎓 🎊

>>353795
>She LOST money on bonds. Federal fucking bonds!
The Supreme Court has ruled that J is prohibited from participating in the national economy at any level.

>>353801
And a good place to poke back into 3-dimensional space for a bit, when she needs to feel something against what is now her real body.
>spoiler
Literally or a robot equivalent to schlicking?

>>353799
How can you be sure this cult isn't connected to other similar organizations or has information about their location if you can't interrogate the cultists? They would have been dead anyway, but the opportunity to find more of these bastards and kill them before they kill anyone else was lost.

>>353799
>Pavo's just mad that she blueballsed his his own rampage.
So why arent they both locked up or dismantled? They literally got two extremely unstable psychopaths.

>>353806
I know how to save her! I will force her to commit tax fraud!

>>353786
Bait use to be believable

BAAAAWS! DA LINE IS GOING DOWN, BAWS! HEEEEELP!

>>353807
Only one's unstable. And in that story there's also only one because that's the original shy Pavo.

I bet Pavo's favourite character is Shadow the Hedgehog.

>>353790
She's stuck in an environment she despises - she's not loyal to the current government, hates how anything Solver is treated like its normal to have around and everyone either hates her or is afraid of her. Let's not mention the mental damage she has with psychopathy and PTSD. Of course her mind isn't OK and why she's pissed all the time.

>>353814
Pavo loves ALL Sonic characters. No he has not played any of the games, he only watch that cartoon from the 90s.

>>353775
AM you are a bad influence and if you don't stop you're trading places with Lucy
It's into the box with you

>>353798
Oh man! I remember that funpost.... ah good times, I wrote the Vee keeper green as a sort of "I'm sorry" for the Enn stapler green Izz if you can read this I'm really sorry for that one

>>353820
>Don’t worry about the antennae.
Are they sensitive? Can I use them for antennae play?

>>353820
The antennae are really intrusive.
Also it makes her look like a proto-reddit logo.

>>353820
What's with the antenna?

>>353811
Shut up, I'm shorting the business

>>353824
Most of that applies to Shadow too. They can all be edgy together.

>>353824
>Pavo sees Sonic as a HFY series

Kek

Femchud dronecels don't exist schizo, take your meds

>Fun fact The logo on her shirt is the empty set.
>>353822
Incredibly sensitive
>>353823
That explains her misery.
>>353825
For the funnies and keybugs reference.

>>353827
The only solution is to push for the 1:1 law (1 state mandated technician husband/wife for every drone no matter the kind of drone they are)

>>353817
Lol, that's literally me.

>>353834
Guilty, sentenced to life in the chan nebula

>>353812
Even if they'd been spared, they could have been used to capture and kill many more bad drones, saving the lives of many people. But Switch killed those people, killed them with her stupidity and self-love, and she still dares to claim she did nothing wrong. It's a miracle the other sentinel drones, and especially Pavo, didn't kill her for it, for innocent blood, spilled by the one who was supposed to protect them, always demands vengeance.

>>353836
>”oh no! [barely contained excitement] please don’t sentence me to spending forever with an entire civilization of my Anon! [disingenuous pleading]”

Anon
Doil isn't real, your wife died to cyn years ago
You need to let go

>>353841
Just enjoy the Lizzy suffering.

once glitch runs out of money and they have to hunt Liam back to the studio to make season 2, they will have to play into Lizzy's character depth

>>353838
If they're organized enough to keep records, then they're organized enough to know that such records must be encrypted and, if necessary, destroyed at any second. That's how structures so powerful behave that their elimination requires literally military forces like sentinel drones, not police like regular sentinel drones.

Switch fucked up, fucked up terribly, fucked up so badly that there's no forgiveness for it, but it seems Holly has become too attached to her.

>Be me, Doomer drone.
>Woke up in my messy toxic waste of a room again.
[I woke up.]
>Visor cracked worse than yesterday.
>Battery at 12%, that shitty recharge cable only works if I hold it at exactly 47 degrees.
>Oil stains on my hoodie and empty cans of whatever coolant I could find.
[terrible lifestyle. poor decisions]
>Boot up my old pad.
>First thing I do is open the thread.
>There he is.
>My Anon husbando.
>The one anon who actually sticks around
>I type it before I can stop myself.
>"Anon... low power again. everything sucks. hug?"
[I have my Anon husbando]
>He always replies.
>Give tons of love and support, no questions.
>Understands me like no one else.
>"You're not alone, we'll fix the cable today. one step at a time"
>For a minute her visor glows a little brighter.
>He gets it.
>The endless night, the feeling that nothing matters.
>Says he'll help turn my life around.
>I almost believe it this time.
>Then the doomscrolling starts
[Doomscrolling]
>Mindlessly refreshing the board, then pirated old human shows.
>Visor pressed close to the cracked screen, battery dropping to 8%.
>Hours passes no vanish.
>I know it's bad but the static fills the emptiness
[Hit the bar]
>Drag myself to the old bar on the corner.
>Some sketchy worker drones running the place
>Trade scrap for watered-down coolant that tastes like battery acid
>Get too low power and start venting to strangers about how humanity never loved us in my drunken state.
>One laughs, another tries to hit on me.
>I just slump harder and play doomer music louder on my headphones.
>Bad decisions piling up again.
>Going back home with 4%.
>Collapse onto the pile of old blankets and scraps.
[Go to sleep]
>Dreaming of Anon again.
>Warm arms, proper recharge station, him fixing my visor while calling me his favorite drone.
>No more cracked screen, no more 47-degree awkward charge.
>Just silence with shared headphones music on the background with someone who cares.
>Then the auto-shutdown warning hits.
[I woke up to my miserable life again.]
>12% battery.
>Same cracked visor. same ruined room.
>Still a mess. Still alone.
[I will never feel Anon touch.]

>>353844
>not police like regular sentinel drones.
I meant disassembly drones. It's one o'clock in the morning, I need to sleep.

>>353847
Kek, I just realized that this all sounds a lot like self-justification on Switch's part. Since her ego has exploded beyond all reasonable and unreasonable limits, she might actually think everyone hates her because they're all assholes, and not because she's a narcissistic bitch who's responsible for ruining an important operation and killing many innocent people.

Kissing Pidge!

>>353848 (me)
I may have been a bit (perhaps too much) vulgar in emphasizing Switch's narcissism, but in reality, her actions and words clearly show that she's way too narcissistic. Even for Inco, the man literally awaiting a tribunal, her behavior is beyond the pale, so she might actually be justifying her actions like this. She really needs to get her brain fixed.

>>353849
That's why major operations involve more than one police station, that's one, and why disassembly drones will be called upon en masse to counter other disassembly drones, that's two.

>>353845
>Be Anon
>Pressured into civil service after a certain incident
>Said incident involved you saying some choice words to a police officer
>You took the droneless virgin plea deal to not end up in prison
>Thing is you have to find yourself a drone wife or you're getting send to uber prison with tentacocks and spiked coochies
>The search has been... unsuccessful to say the least
>Alright let's not kind ourselves you stayed home and posted/lurked on your favorite image board
>You'd say it's anonymous but as it turns out the government has everyone neatly logged
>You know which posters are drones and you HAVE to be nice to them under the threat of uber rape
>There is this one though
>Man you're sad just reading the stuff she posts
>Whenever you reply to her you actually mean the nice things you say
>The deadline for you getting that drone partner is drawing rather close
>Speak of the devil, your court appointed handler is calling you right now
"Hey there sexless detriment #34568!"
>She is a J unit
>"I see you're browsing a certain dronecell's file again"
>"Y-yeah"
"Listen, those file are meant to help you find someone with similar interests to you but you've done nothing but browsed them for three months"
>"Sorry I just..."
>"You either tell me right now with which one of these 'lucky' drones I'm going to arrange a date for you with or you're going straight to the slammer"
>Ah fuck
>Well let's think about it
>The sentinel you're neighbors with is out of the question, she's into some freaky shit
>That DD you spoke a few times with got sent to rehab after she was found in an underground blood bar
>Most of the drones from the dossier are just not your type
>"Uh.... this one?"
"The one whose file you have open?"
>"Yes?"
"Alright, good enough for me, get ready you're getting into a shuttle in 15 minutes"
>"Shuttle?"
"Yeah dummy, how else are you going to get to her?"
>You read the file more closely
>She lives on another planet
>You have made a terrible mistake
"Alright Anon no taksies backsies, the shuttle is on route and I already arranged living quarters for you two, good luck!"
>Your handlers hangs up
>Maybe you should at least try to pack your bags?

>>353852
She's fighting for the title of the biggest loser drone with Y?!

>>353857
Dummy!

>>353855
Oy vey! Y is best girl!
>>353857
Damn right Y is wining! First a warhammer game and then she collects what she won I've learnt to enjoy it when she forces me to do weird stuff, or at least that's what I say to my self while crying myself to sleep

>>353854
>lives on another planet
Misery loves company… and on this one is the only resident.

>>353856
Anon, people, and now drones, know how to control their inner urges and give up their freedom to live in safety and prosperity. This is called society.

>>353862
>Be Anon
>The express flight was something else
>You've been vomiting for the past 15 minutes
"You done?"
>Your handler came with you for some reason
>"Yeah just... give me a sec"
"Listen, the plan is simple you go over to your little bundle of joy, introduce yourself and then she swoons over you and you two live happily ever after"
>"You sure this will work"
"I run a few simulations and this strategy had a 80% success ratio"
>"And that 20%?"
"Don't worry about it"
>J slaps you on the back and pushes you towards the apartment where the drone you chose lives
>You knock on the door
>It opens and you just barely get a glimpse of her
>Cracked screen, a low power flashing on the not broken side, stains on her chassis
>"Hi-"
>You get the door slammed in your face
>Uhhh what now?
>Your J handler is looking at you amused from a nearby roof
>You knock again
>No response
"Anon~ You know what happens if you don't score that gremlin~"
>J got a lot closer to you
>You bang at the door like your life depends on it (it does)
>After a while you try to bust down the door
>It opens and you see the drone you're meant to be wooing right now
>She's... lying on the floor
>Her eyes flicker on her screen once and it goes dark
>"Uhhh, what now?"
>J throws a drone repair manual at you
"You figure things out"
>"Uh... I don't"
>J throws a tool box at you
>You just barely dodge it
"Alright, that's all you need to fix your love bird up, I'll come pick you two up tomorrow to move you into something less dingy, good luck stud"
>With that J leaves
>Well maybe you should start by picking her up and placing her on the bed?
>The charging cable she has here is busted
>You go and fetch a fresh one from the tool box

>>353867
>Ascendant Homo Deus : clangs drones because humans are yucky

>>353861
Akwsually. The term you are looking for is gyaku-ryona
Reverse

>>353868
>Homo Dominus: drones are cute :3

>>353869
Neat! I learned something today.
>>353863
Kinda hot, actually.

>>353838
Holy shit a peacock

>>353874
Not just a peacock, but a hot peacock!

>>353874
>"Please to be looking at my dumpy saar," the peacock said

>>353845
:(

>>353854
:)
>>353862
:(
>>353866
:)

>>353850
>Pidge shits herself in fright

Pavo
But with long flowing hair

Pavo
But he's dead

Pavo
But he isn't an all-devouring black hole of attention who all threads must devote at least a third of their posts to

Pidge
But she do a little funny dance

Pidge
But she do a funny scream

Remember SD-R? Well she's back!
In pog form!

>>353892
Tomoe won.

>>353891
Awww

>>353897
Funi

>>353897
I'm the only one willing to make jokes about Pavo being a SEAmonkey green peacock, so Pavo being a Pajeet Indian peacock it is.

>>353897
It's funny. It also makes someone upset which makes it even funnier.

>>353901
>It's reactionary posting whenever Pablo gets brought up
ChadYes.jpg

>>353900
>t.otally not seething over the peacock

>>353901
Awww

>>353903
>I AM NOT SEETHING! I AM NOT SEETHING, YOU BLOODY BENCHOD BASTARD! DO NOT REDEEM PAVOJEET GREEN!

>>353904
my neck hurts reading that

>>353906
nta but shut the fuck up
trolling died a long time ago and youre not 14 anymore

>>353897
Spiteposters doing what they do best.

Is Pillar ban evading?

>go to sleep
>have nightmares of getting fucked by an oil ghost of your dead gf
>wake up to her corpse in your bed next to you

>>353915
>implying you didn't have it next to you when you fell asleep

>>353840
>Lizzy thinks Doll was always stronger than her
Honestly it took serious robo-guts for Lizzy, a mundane worker drone, to try interrupting Doll's whole prom murder plan at the last moment. While her reasoning for doing so may have been selfish and shallow, with hindsight it's absolutely for the best that Doll's plan for revenge was foiled

All Drones are cute

>>353918
afaik "Tessa" would just call in backup for the Cabin Fever trip in the form of "a clone of" V. An oddly nervous and rattled "clone of" V. Beforehand, N learns to tolerate Doll, the new (and not-secret keeping) third member of the trio, at Camp 98.7 after they bond over the disdain for Rachel that N rapidly grew to share with Doll, and (at a minimum) that kid V domed to get everyone's attention comes back alive.

>>353919
Except FUCKING Rachel.

What's the difference between Jaybirds and Joblins?

>>353924
And/or that was just the first thing she could think to say to get her attention.

>>353917
>the next "dangerous" girl
Or boy, judging from how Lizzy thought N snapping at V was hot.

>>353928
I figured V for breaking away from Cyn the moment she got the chance, personally.

>>353929 (just saw this after writing this:)
>>353930
So, V would still end up fighting against the vore demon who soul raped her. Possibly announced by literally shooting the AS in the back when it's expecting her to back it up like J?

>>353932
Good news is she won't have to worry for long, since not having V- oh wait that doesn't really change much, does it, Cyn is effectively untouchable the entire fight and only loses because Uzi reads her. Huh.

>>353932
>Uzi, now the owner of the AS's soul collection, demonstrates her new power by horking V back up in a fresh core
>"Lizzy, why do both of my corpses have some of your chapstick on their lips?"

>>353933
The final battle, as one critical Anon once remarked on /co/, amounted to two autistic goblins fighting over who gets to fuck N

>>353936
Uzi is the only one fucking N there. The AS is in the cuck tail.

What if we took N....and pushed him somewhere else!

>>353939
Ow. My heart.
>the stinger in this one goes on to have Uzi's tail's eyes abruptly turn white
>"Who said you could talk?" her tail snaps in V's voice, to seemingly no one
>As Uzi removes the bow, V nuzzles her
>"Thanks for giving me somewhere to rest."
>Uzi, still tired but now smiling, slowly closes her locker

>>353942 (me)
>>353939
Also, artist for that one?

>>353942 (me)
>>353939
*turn from yellow to white

>>353943
Not entirely sure, here's the Pinterest link though:

https://pin.it/6ELqiCYHy

Sex.
With drones?
We can only pray that fate will be so merciful.

>get blowjob from the Absolute Solver
>surprisingly, it doesn't bite your dick off
>but it was sucking you off with a black hole's worth of gravity
>have fun with your spaghettified dick, dude

>>353948
Man, in like, 5000 years when those nerve signals get back to me it's going to be a trip.

>>353950
>making jokes

what jokes would Doomer even make? are they funny? can she meaningfully socialize with others?