Top Seeded 1. The Miser Bros: Heat Miser and Snow Miser (The Year Without a Santa Claus): 41 2. Primal Duo: Spear and Fang (Primal): 39 3. Assholish AS Duo: Monarch and Master Shake (ATHF/Venture Bros): 34 4. SCAM Inc: Mr Krabs and Stanley Pines (Gravity Falls/Spongebob): 34 5. Team Gadgets and GET-zmos: Jack Spicer and GwenPool (GwenPool/Xiaolin Showdown): 33 6. Fake Santas: Jack Skellington and The Grinch (Nightmare Before Christmas/How the Grinch Stole Christmas): 31 7. Cracking Cheese Lovers: Wallace and Gromit (Wallace and Gromit): 31 8. Bad Things seem to happen to people who don't Vote Wilkins: Wilkins and Wontkins (Wilkins Ad): 31 9. Dapper Dealers: Bill Cipher and Alastor (Gravity Falls/Hazbin Hotel): 30 10. Patience and Humility: Samurai Jack and Simon Laurent (Infinity Train/Samurai Jack): 30
The 2’s A /co/ tourney is a single elimination tournament where teams of 2 duke it out for both the glory of being the best tag team as well as snazzy and horribly inefficient championship belts.
ONLY CORRECT CHOICES >Pepe and Kermit >Wilkins and Wontkins >Henchmen 21 and 24 >Aku and Scaramouche >Monarch and Master Shake >Ape Shaman and Krog > Hank and Bobby Hill >TOAA and Moses >jimmy and Timmy >Frollo and Gaston >Jose and Panchito >Blitzo and Stolas >Jack and the Grinch >Bert and Ernie >Calvin and Hobbes >Red Guy and Him >Blacksad and Weekly >Ashi and Grace >Miguel and Tulio >Johnny and Jenny >Jimmy and Heloise >Billy and Mandy >Klaus and Jesper >Wall E and EVE >Tom and Jerry >Simon and Jack >Krabs and Pines >Miser Bros >Huey and Riley >Aladdin and Genie >Star and Gertrude >Dick and Muttley >Numbuh 1 and Numbuh 5 >Agent K and Agent J >Hogarth and the Iron Giant >Karen and Plankton >Jesse and Lake >Mao Mao and Badgerclops >Jack and Gwen >Basil and Dawson >Hilda and Twig >Toph and Daredevil >Bill and Alastor >Popeye and Olive >Morticia and Gomez >Robotnik and Koopa >Lilo and Stitch >Farmer 1 and 2 >Tyr and Dr Mrs >Bugs and Daffy >Oswald and Mickey >Mordecai and Rigby >Wallace and Gromit >Starfire and Raven >Zone-tan and Shuma-Gorath >Yakko and Wakko >Dan and Chris >Scratch and Grounder >Splinter and Iroh >Sarah Bellum and Hello Nurse >Felix and Calhoun >Timon and Pumba >Johnny and Plank >Jessica and Roger Rabbit
>>427282 >Howard: Greetings /co/ fans! It's a beautiful evening for a tournament and a race! My name is Howard "Buckshot" Holmes! And I'm joined by my co host, Kreese Kreely! Kreese, tell us, what happened to get us here? >Kreese: Well Howard, as you must know already, jannies are horrible at their job even though they do it for free. So they naturally set off a bunch of nukes on the initial location of the tournament, resulting in all the contestants having to flee from the nuclear fallout and the location turning into a toxic waste dump. >Howard: I thought 4chan was already a toxic waste dump? >Kreese: It is but we never had something like this happen. Thankfully we were no where near the blast zone but a few of the nominees got hit and are now mutating into abominations that even god couldn't love. >Howard: That's unfortunate for them but fortunate for the audience because they will now be used as hazards during the race. >Kreese: Expect to see some irradiated chunks fly into the splash zone! We got cameras in every nook and cranny of the tracks, enough booze up here to kill the liver of every elephant in Africa, and a fuck ton of entertaining matches! >Howard: So place your bets, reeve up your engines, and get ready because it's tiiiiiiiiiime for the Tag Team Tournament! >Kreese: So much fun it hurts!
Alright while I wait on TTA I figured I'd ask you guys for some help. If there's a particular image you want used for the background on your duo's name tag, please LINK it. If it's already canon or very popular I shouldn't have any problems finding images to use, but if it's niche and you happen to have the one piece of fan art, feel free to let me know. Otherwise I'm going to use a gradient of the characters' two most prominent colors. Also, TTA: I noticed the bracket won't have much room for the tags I'm using, so I'm making two tags for each team. One will be the size of the Ms./Mr. /co/ tags (but left blank) that'll be easier to fit onto the image, and the larger ones with the names for later rounds. You can use them however you want obviously but I thought I'd try and make things a little easier for you. Also I'll take requests after I'm done, but that probably won't be until tomorrow or Tuesday.
>>427358 I can't see any except the main ones (Ashi/Grace, Jack/Simon, Amity/Jackie, and Spicer/Gwen). The rest are from shows or thematic pairings. As for the meme ones they generate fun content so I am chill with it.
And there we have it! A surprisingly low turnout, to be sure, but you all know how things are after a few explosive events, hahahaha!
Miser Bros have pulled in at the #1 spot, much to the displeasure of a few! Meanwhile we’ve got teams no one would consider getting in: like Jack Spicer winning the bid of Gwenpool, and the mighty Monarch having to run with a talking beverage instead of his beloved wife!
Ah, but this is still just the beginning! Stay tuned, ladies and gentlemen, and do hold on because this ride is about to get hectic!
And remember: Rewards shall be in store for those that vote Cipher and I all the way to the top!
>>427360 Hide the Scorpio symbol somewhere in Wilkins and Wontkins. The idea of Wilkins having taken Vriska's power(from the end of the last thread and still being continued here) is so fucking hillarious it needs reference
Good evening everyone. This is your host Don, here at the starting line at the Temple of Isis! (No not the terrorist one) Let's get a few words from our contestants. >>427326 >>427335 Hey! You two! Yeah, the demons! How thrilled are you to be working together in this big event?
>Howard: And they are off to the races! It's mechanical mayhem out there already! While we watch, let's take some questions from the audience! >Kreese: Some these cars look weird. Hell the kaiju don't even have cars, they're just walking and running.
>>427417 Oh we made sure there was no cheating going on. You're just not as popular as you think you are. Sorry but you're just gonna have to watch this one. You're free to support your favorite team though.
MINIONS! Your Monarch beckons you to heed his call!
Alright... I've had a bit of time to calm down. Brewed up some tea, sat down, and now rather than feeling only blinding, unrelenting fury I am only feeling the slightest twinge of murderous intent. One vote. One, FUCKING vote kept me from running alongside my darling, and now I am forced to run this shit show with Master fucking Shake. THE biggest prick this side of yours truly in this whole sad escapade.
So, I just want a show of hands. Merely curious, no punishments will be had here, I JUST want to know how many of you voted for me and Shake over me and my Queen. Come on, don't be shy, I swear no one's judging, I just want to get an idea.
>>427454 So you're saying if Dan/Chris and MaoMao/Badger kept winning, they'd be the FINAL 2, making the first match of Mr. /co/ the last match of the Tag Team, and allowing arguably the first big rivarly of that match time to stew?
>>427411 And we're back! Again. The next batch of racers is arriving now, led by Wander and Sylvia. Wallace and Gromit squeak along in some crazy contraption. You just never know what to expect from those two. Babs and Buster Bunny, apparently unrelated, grace the road along with Moxxie and Millie who here to represent I.M.P. I wonder if they know about their boss? And there's Johnny and Plank, with the Bombshell Rabbits Roger and Jessica in the wackiest of racers. The Galactic Jobbers Galactus and Antimonitor are in it to lose it if their team name is any indication. Mr. Morris and Scruffy drive their street sweeper to compete for the cash prize! The cash prize that doesn't exist, of course. Best beware of the The Emperor's New Daughters, Star Butterfly and Gertrude Fairyland. The race hasn't even started and they've already made enemies.
And here we have the darlings of the digits, Simon Laurent and Samurai Jack in the Chapel Convertible. I can still hear the wedding bells. Let's hope they steer clear of the strikingly intimidating Camelot Crusaders, Ruber and The Griffon. Wirt and Beatrice had a car, can't remember what it looked like though. God my memory is shit. I remember Billy and Mandy though, a rather strained relationship there.
And there goes EVE with WALL-E in tow, who has a fire extinguisher for some reason? Behind them floats the Bottle Rocket with Wayward Vagabond and Peregrine Mendicant at the helm. Rorschach and The Question are on the scene to, uhh, up the ante into vigilante. Did I really write that? Whatever, Hank and Bobby Hill are next in their car. Doesn't look suited for the track. Then again, neither do they.
I can hear the arguing of the Assholish AS Duo from up in the announcer's booth. Seems Mr. Monarch isn't happy that he's separated from his wife, and getting stuck with Master Shake isn't helping. I give them a few hours before they kill each other.
Twin teams from the afterlife, it's the Ghost Lolis and the Devilish Duo in their own suitably spine-chilling carts. The Grumpy Warlords Grievous and Vilgax should prove to be tough competition. Grievous alone is a legendary slayer of Jedi, I wouldn't want to make him mad. Nor would I want to stand in the way of Calvin and his stuffed tiger, but that's just because I'm not good with kids. No clue how he made it in alone though. Perhaps some law and order is necessary to set this matter straight, which is why it's lucky we have Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde with their police cruiser. That siren means business!
Yet another duo from down below manifests in Charlie and Satina. Yeah, it's a good team and all, but surely there are #bettercartoons out there. Like KND, who has Numbuhs 1 and 5 visiting from Sector V. Though they'd better keep an eye out for Father, who has teamed up with The Beast for some pitch-black punishment. An amphibious alliance hops by next with Kermit and Pepe the Frog, apparently unrelated.
Good and evil rock the bracket as Black Hat and Demencia precede Moses and The One Above All. Scooby Doo and Courage take the Mystery Machine for a spin with Aladdin and the Genie riding a carpet towards eventual victory. Wishful thinking if you ask me.
I'll admit, kiddo: You're definitely right about all of this being exciting so far. You and your new friend do your best against the screaming duck and rabbit, while Wuya and I take care of that bunny and mouse! That magic cloak I gave you'll be useful in the race as long as you watch where the wind blows it!
>>427301 >"I know, right?! Had my hopes but Top 5 is pretty sweet. Here's hoping we can hold on to that momentum." >"You take the wheel first, I'll be on radio and shot-gun duty." >>427448 >"Now don't underestimate them just cause they're kids. Kids can be crafty. They can SMELL weakness and move in on it. Gotta keep on your toes, and not make yourself a target." >>427299 >>427302 >"Hey, don't be so nervous! Going up against tough odds can be scary, trust me I know, but we can try to have fun here. It's not like Black Widow's around to 'mop up' losers this time, she's too busy competing."
>>427458 Fuck you, you straw-headed dick! You know how much I was looking forward to competing alongside my Queen! If am going to be stuck with you, then by God almighty we are going to be doing things my way, you got it? I'm the one with the ride, be it my unstoppable Cocoon or my evil Monarch Mobile, so you are going to be as quiet as freaking possible on this trip or so help me I will pull over to bury you in a ditch by the highway. >>427475 >>427470 I see. Yes, very funny Spicer. Veeerry funny. Henchman 69, the next time Jacky boy here needs to take a break from the wheel and catch a few winks... 'take care' of him. And just because I know this won't get through to you the first time I say it, I am putting as much emphasis on the 'take care' part as I fur-reeking can. >>427474 FUN? You see the jackass I have to share a vehicle with for the next seven days? In what of the nine rings of hell could a single minute with this arrogant soft-served talking beverage be considered 'fun'. I could have been running the Monarch Mobile with my hot wife, now I bet she's up in some Martian Cruiser while I have to listen to his inane ramblings day in and day out!
it's not like I don't agree Gwen/spicer's support doesn't take a LOT from RP posts but the pair itself isn't what I'd consider your normal crackship, they're surprisingly synergistic. >Roughly same age-group, teens trying to make it as a hero/villain >Both resemble the first real 'friend' you see the other has in their respective series, Gwen looks much like Ashe (Katnappe) with pink-hair dye and Jack like a red-haired Cecil >Gwen's younger brother Teddy was also better at computers than her so Jack may remind her of him. >Both also share a few traits like Cecil/Jack's genius for computers and Ashe/Gwen's enthusiasm for mayhem >Both have an arc around wanting to be recognized by others, Gwen establishing her place among the Marvel pantheon and Jack's insecurities forming his desire to rule the world >Both often straddle the line between good and evil frequently >Both use a varied arsenal in combat and have weird goggles >Both come from mediums that like to use a little western animesque in their style You might say these are minor similarities or that I'm reaching, but it's at lot more than what you'd assume is there on a first glance. Which is what I think is a fun part of Tag-Team tournament, is finding unconventional or funny pairings you wouldn't think of right away, and RP just happened to be the avenue for thinking it up. or maybe that they sync more than expected is what made the RP
>>427472 Classic champions return as Johnny Bravo and Jenny Wakeman roll up in a white and gold car. (Don't worry, there's no judges in a race.) It makes the sight of Xavier and Xavier running by even more pathetic. But look at them go! The power of shoddy 2007 animation is a powerful and mystical one, and it apparently allows the duplicates to run without their feet ever touching the ground.
This year's christmas will be anything but merry if Jack Skellington and The Grinch have anything to say about it. They've each contributed one "reindeer" to their shared sled, and while it doesn't help in the speed department, it does male for decent headlights. Above them is a futuristic jet designed, built, and piloted by Dr. Flug with 505 to provide support. Frollo and Gaston renew their partnership in the world of entertainment to compete for the championship. Darkwing Duck and Launchpad McQuack are putting their aviation skills to use with a shiny new biplane. And there's Scratch and Grounder in a new invention from Dr. Robotnik, without permission if my sources are to be believed. Looks like they're already thinking of ways to rig the race, those scoundrels.
Bored yet? Too bad. Blue Beetle and Booster Gold are running in a grounded jet painted in blue and gold. Hello Nurse and Sarah Bellum are WOOOOO LORDY BIG BAZONGERS YOU WON'T SEE THIS ON MODERN TELEVISION AWOOOGA HUMINA HUMINA, while Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff showcase the shittiest looking car I've ever seen. It was probably made by imigrants. And there's Mao Mao and Badgerclops patrolling the raceway on a flying scooter.
Looks like the mail truck's here with Postman Pat and Jess behind the wheel. Ramses and Black Widow ride in on a carriage built with the remains of the fallen and towed by enslaved competitors from Mr. /co/. Jesse Cosay and Lake share a motorcycle, while Henchmen 21 and 24 blast tunes from their car. Coop sits behind the wheel of Optimus Prime. Who's driving? Who knows. Dipper Pines and Dib Membrane drive Taz's old Cruiser at the back of the caravan along with Jimmy Neutron and Timmy Turner in an oddly green and pink tank.
And sneaking in at the very back, it's a Wacky Races staple, Dick Dastardly and his dog Muttley. Also known as the illegitimate winners of Mr. /co/ 2020. >Illegitimate? Why, I stole that trophy fair and square! This conniving crook is no doubt up to his old tricks. Can the other racers beat this cheat? Stay tuned to find out this and more on the way out Wacky Races!
>>427386 I will tell you that this matchup is quite interesting! Especially after how rudely Cipher treated me at the wedding!
The charming Princess Charlie herself begged me to be on her team, but even she ended up happy with that little imp with wings on her side!
>>427488 Look at it this way, Mr. Monarch! Even if you and the shake go down, the trophy still has a chance of being taken to your cocoon by either your wife or one of your henchmen! A win from one of you is still a win for the whole team, isn't it?
Golly, I'd say you've got enough Monarch representation scattered over this bracket, consisting of you, your darling wife, those two henchmen of yours, the henchgirl with Spicer and.....aren't Spear and Fang still living with you?
Wojaks have been up for an hour now on /co/, so you might be safe making the tourney thread now Just link the tournament google poll and this thread saying round 1 is happening here, not a long paragraph and not an angry post directed to anyone
>>427483 >Howard: We can do both. We are men of many talents. I'm able to masturbate with both hands by driving. Sure I've run over several hobos but I have busted triple the nuts! >Kreese: You car must look like a satanic ritual. Just full of blood and semen.
>>427502 Red: Yeah, right. Purple: That's not even how that saying goes. It's "Assuming makes an ass out of you and me". Red: Just goes to show how dumb people become when they focus on getting off instead of school. Purple: No wonder why humanity's education is so bad.
>>427497 Agreed. All memes aside these two also have a lot in common: >both start on the wrong side and eventually turn to good over the course of the season >both had shitty childhoods >both had shitty parents >both forced to train in the things their parents want against their will >both use this childhood training to fight >violent >ninja skills >cult aspect >both wear masks >both end up protecting what they originally wanted to kill It started as a meme choice, but then you realize they work well together. One who started a cult is working with another who is the victim of one which proves to her even more how dangerous and soul sucking (heh) cults are.
>>427494 Yeah, no thanks. Even assuming whatever inside him isn't radioactive and remotely palatable in the first place, I'll lean on giving him as few opportunities for 'sucking off' jokes as possible. And early elimination is not an option. As always, in spite of less than ideal conditions, I will reach forth and grab victory with the shit hand God has dealt me. >>427500 Let's not delude ourselves, Shake, clearly *I* am carrying this team. I've got it all: minions, a killer mobile base, and I'm married to the one and only Ms. FREAKING /co/ 2020! I think I'm entitled to call the shots here. >>427503 Yeah, that's the one bright spot to this: between the lot of us the Cocoon has so many entrants we got a better shot at winning than most, but if the winner isn't myself or Dr. Mrs. it'll be a cup of victory only half full. And, eh, yeah they still hang around the Cocoon and they still got their uniforms but I don't think they're hanging around because I TELL them too. The Neanderthal and the dinosaur are on their own wavelength, the closest I can get out of either is a 'URG URG GRUG' whenever I try to give orders. They still seem to get along swimmingly with 69 but even she can't really tell them what to do.
>>427421 I have no reason right now to believe that you speak the truth, human.
>>427424 >>427474 And neither of you are displaying the force needed to get me inside that little thing. Your words alone have as much value as a speck of dust. How do you even know that cage will be enough for me?
>>427518 So Monarch. How does it feel to squirm because of the power of the people’s choice?
If you were as mighty as you say, you would be doing much better mentally than you are now.
>>427477 >"I do too, but, still, don't wanna go crushing kids' dreams or anything right out of the gate... though I guess I read somewhere if you don't take them seriously it hurts their pride too? Hmm, tough call." >>427488 >>427477 >"Right, got it Mr. The Monarch! I'll 'take care' of him. Wink wink." >"I think he means it's okay to heat up some of that cocoa I swiped from the galley for us before I left. He's a cool boss sometimes."
>>427503 Nice to see that even residents of hell can find happiness. Now let's see who else is here. >>427475 >>427477 Ah yes, Gwen and Spicer. I have seen relationships grow stronger during these competitions, but i have also seen them get ruined. Are you worried that your new relationship might not survive the troubles that are ahead?
>Trollberg >MIB >Smooth Sailing >A Boy and his Dogwood >Pups of Panic >For Free >Grumpy Warlords >Ineptive Invaders >Primal Duo >The Chum Bucket >Hench 4 Life >Showtime >Hell's Princesses >North Pole Express >Patrick's Inferno >Platonic Friends >The OG King and Queen >Catdog >I turned myself into a pickle-inator >No Relation >Heaven's Eyes >Paranormal Preteens >Duality of Frog >Lilo and Stitch >Enemies of the Samurai >Ghost Lolis >The Frollo Show >Goofy Goobers >Miser Bros >Wicked Witches >Fast and Furry-ous >SCAM Inc. >Addams Family >Duck Clean >Regular Team
>>427522 Oh, hey there! You can call me Weekly! Nice to meet ya! As for the camera, I'm a reporter for a tabloid in New York City. >>427529 The pleasure's all mine, sir! Might I say I'm a fan of your outfit. So mysterious.
>>427405 That's not the attitude, is it? Did giving up thwart Baron Greenback's plans to melt the polar ice caps? Did keeling over stop Count Duckula from hypnotizing everyone on planet earth? Did sighing and walking away save Professor's father from a particularly fragrantly offensive fate? That may work for you in whatever juvenile fanclubs you consort with, but I'm not about to let a crustacean and a scam artist end our run before it's even begun.
I mean, honestly! A couple of old, doddering CEOs with a hoarding problem? What are they gonna do, stock exchange us into submission? Ooh, I'm so scared! I can defeat that money-grubbing megalomaniac CEO Crumhorn every week without a single hitch, so who says I can't defeat two of him? I almost feel cruel in being given the privilege to send these two old-timers packing in humiliating defeat, and here you are, moping about, instead of embracing this opportunity to prove ourselves! If you ever find yourself becoming fixated on ridiculous, absurd, positively downright bizarre notions like me NOT winning a competition, I want you to stop and think... What would Danger Mouse do? The answer, of course, is simple - I win. It's what I do! Don't accept a reality that has yet to actually transpire, especially a false reality as hilariously fictitious as the existence of women on these imageboards. It's the wild west here, Ian, anything can happen and you can bet your me-themed trading cards this isn't my first rodeo.
So chin up, as always! If we're going to be underdogs, we're going to be the best damn underdogs these tourneygoers have ever seen! And if we go down - which, hm, we most certainly won't - we shall go down in a blaze of glory outshining any cheap victory these slimy, supercilious side show attractions may try to claim over us!
...I know that was quite a rousing speech, but you can let go of my hand now.
>>427282 Looks like our first match is with a couple of rabbits, eh lad? Better break out the old Anti-Pesto tools and deliver them to Lady Tottingham’s rabbit preserve. Make sure not to rough em up, Gromit!
>>427536 Do I have a good reason to do as you say at this time?
>>427541 When you participate in a contest that involves the infamous Owl Lady and many creatures from all sort of dimensions with their own diverse sets of skills, powers and behaviors, you cannot be fully trustworthy towards everything that involves it now, can you?
>>427543 Oh, yeah, I had kinda forgot about that. Egghead said he's, and I quote, "more interested in establishing a relationship between like-minded individuals, rather than worrying about any familial relationships". That and we're still waiting on the test results.
>>427554 You got it Weekly! Just make sure you and Blacksad watch out for the other contestants; these guys get wild and try to run you off the road! I've packed my bags with a first aid kit in case of an emergency.
>>427554 >>427558 I'll be giving you encouragement from outside this race gentlemen. I dont think it's illegal to have a little eye in the sky, just in case... Also... >>427519 Blacksad, Is there anything new about the Ramses case?
>>427527 >"Oh, huh... well buckle up for a bit of disappointment, it looks like I didn't grab cocoa. I think I grabbed coffee instead. 'Wilkins'? Sounds old-timey." >>427526 >"Dude, no need to make things out to be so dramatic... I mean I guess that's kind of the point of this whole thing is drama but, I think things are going just fine." >"Jack and I are just out here having fun in the race, taking it nice and easy... er, not literally, I mean we're trying to go pretty fast, but you know what I mean." >>427531 >"Hey, don't knock yourself. You're a super-genius with a rad garage and a killer triple axel. You're practically the closest thing your show has to a Tony Stark, trust me you'd do fine with girls."
K: I'm Sea Crab! S: And I'm Man! Both: And we're Sea Crab and Man Incorporated! S: We're coming to you from one of our many SCAM warehouses that we totally own to thank all our loyal investors! K: Thanks to you, our loyal investors, we've made it to Round 1, and profits are through the roof! S: Anyone who didn't invest in SCAM stock while it was priced the lowest it'll ever be really missed out! K: But don't worry! The cost of one vote may have risen but it's still reasonably priced! S: But don't wait! The price, and profits for our existing shareholders, are only skyrocketing! K: To sweeten the deal, we're including a commemorative Round 1 SCAM souvenir cup with every purchase of a large Mystery Patty meal! While supplies last. S: All you gotta do to get this sweet deal is show proof you voted for SCAM Inc. in Round 1. That's literally it! Couldn't be easier! I know some of you still won't do it. K: And that's a-okay with me! They'll just make our current investors richer next round! AAARRARRARRARRARRARRARR!! S: Get those votes in, and we'll see you in the next round!
>Jerry we barely made it! >I heard you Alfred! >No time for investigations, I'll take the wheels! >Seems like we're facing off against a young lad and a girl? >Don't underestimate the girl Jerry! She can cook up gadgets that rival your WOOHP's. >Seems like our work would be easier if we go further in the tourney. Let's hope we take the lead. Let's use the WOOHPNITRO-SPEEDSTER!
>>427581 Red: Oh God damnit. Purple: Uh, why don't you go stare into that imp's gun. Make sure it doesn't have any bullets to harm us. Red: And leave your supplies to us. We don't want you to loose them in case something goes wrong.
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>>427520 Hah! Lot of tough talk coming from a so-called super-villain who couldn't even make it past the Qualifiers. As far as the 'peoples choice' boned people over, I'd still say I'm doing better than you. This butterfly's as sharp and as deadly as the name implies, Belos. I'm an A-lister, I can take the blows as they come. >>427523 Hah! Good luck with that, 'genius', considering who you're paired with. Some forewarning: I hope you have child locks on all of your vehicles. FIRST DAY in the Cocoon, 69 flooded my hangar, set the lower-decks on fire, AND broke my web-cam. I've lost track of how much other stuff she's broken just going around the place, you basically partnered up with a Deedee in a butterfly costume.
>>427587 I wouldn't expect a pipsqueak like you to understand what a promotion is. Why would anyone invest in your company? You do have a company, dontcha? Cuz if ya don't, I don't know why I'm wastin' time with ya. I spent my whole career dealing with tiny nuisances, and at this point I'm an expert. Now scram before the health inspector thinks we have a rat problem!
>>427599 >Dude this is only our second date. When you're right, you're right kid. This is the time to show off ALL your stuff and seal the deal, then after the wedding hide it all offshore. If you can find a buddy who lives on the ocean floor, that's the perfect hiding spot.
>>427583 >"Yes. I'm very, very sweet." >>427598 >"Hey, no problem." >"Though, I was really kinda hoping for cocoa. I've got a funny feeling about this Wilkins Coffee. I can't explain it, it feels... kinda cursed. Like, 'explodey' cursed." >>427592 >"Jerry! You made it! Ohmigosh, how are you feeling? After the wedding no one would even let us see you, you were so messed up."
>>427614 >>427592 JERRY! You absolute, unironic son of a bitch! I was hoping you'd make it here. You have much to answer for what I underwent while I was in WOOHP custody. After your reckless sacrifice at the wedding I was afraid I'd miss my chance to repay you for everything. But now, it seems fate has delivered unto me a chance to even the score.
Do you have any idea what it is like to constantly be on the run from a 7-foot black monolith of a man who will stop at nothing to defile your shithole? Or to be vored by a 40 year old tabby-cat and have to fight my way out of an acidic death trap just to see the light of day? Oh, how I've been praying for you to show up to this thing, Jerry.
>>427617 Hey, between us two which of us has been successfully divorced? That's right, this guy. I bet you haven't even been divorced ONCE! Just keep what I said in mind. Demonstrate value. And if you haven't engaged physically or nurtured dependence yet, you're freefalling into the friendzone, kid. Get to it! I'm rootin' for ya!
>>427604 Hurt but not dead, as long as I can stand... I will help the true allies of Justice!
>>427616 The double quads nearly took my life, but I am still recovering. In a way we should thank the Janitors. By exiling us here, the power of GETS are barely enough to put me in harm's way... for now at least.
>>427583 >What do you hope to accomplish? Hopefully we will have our revenge and kill Simon Laurent or otherwise be instrumental to his eventual death! And...we'll also like to win this tourney too. We've been loving the spirit so far! Oh, and Ashi here is getting adjusted to living outside of nightmare futuristic hellscape. She's just got her first Christmas present!
>>427623 Red: "Average Heightest"? How dare you. Purple: "Eat a dick"? What the hell are you talking about? Who's dick? >>427624 Red: Oh yeah, we got that cage yesterday off of eBay. Purple: We got it just for you.
>>427632 >I’d prefer not to be divorced at all Without some proper guidance, you may not even get the chance, kid. Who's gonna help ya? Her cape-wearing dad? Pretty sure he hates ya, and everyone and everything except his smokeshow of a wife. Which is understandable. She's smoking.
>>427625 ...Uuuhh, depends on who's asking, and how angry they are. There's two of us, you know. I'm the one you're NOT asking for in an accusing tone.
>>427626 >Well, make sure to throw yourself and your lame car in with the rest of the garbage! >And always remember to recycle~ >Shut up, Jimmy. We're insulting them, don't give them environmental advice.
>>427621 >Alfred: "While I do understand in your sentiment of frustration mister The Monarch, I would advise against reminding Jerry more of your misfortunes. Your tales have made him laugh so much he has opened all his cicatrised wounds. I am afraid it will be all for now from both of us. I will book us a room at a nearby hotel and rest for the night."
>>427620 >"I'm not sure, I'm tempted to just chuck it out the window but it feels like NOT drinking it is the dangerous part. Seems contradictory, either you drink weird voodoo coffee or you don't and something bad happens. Who would make something like this?" >>427626 >"Well, I'm really glad to see you're okay, but I kinda miss the GETS. Not that they really ever agreed with me anyways, but I thought I was getting better at them. Still, this'll be even more fun with you around. Good luck in the race!"
>>427632 >Alfred: "I am sorry, it seems like Jerry cannot answer himself your question, but I can assure you he has been occupied working with the Justice League... keep it for yourself... but we are here on a mission. I am sure he will share more about it tomorrow with you and miss Gwen."
>>427639 No, you’re definitely the one I’m thinking of, but if you don’t recognize me, well.. Just remember, my name’s Eda, NOT Marilyn, and I DEFINITELY didn’t have anything to do with your first divorce. Got it?
>>427627 I'd probably say something like >Look at you Sugar Gorilla, all those tentacles and yet you still can't manage to hold a victory for shit in comics But I would never say that because my love for my precious Shuma Gorath transcends time and space
>>427630 Nah I don't think I will. Helluva Boss? More like helluva pain in the ass.
>>427631 Same to you coomer. Your fapping skills will get you far in life so keep up the good work
>>427634 I'm pretty sure Dick is the first Robin. He didn't make it into the tournament so please eat him.
>>427649 >"Alright, good luck. If you feel explodey at all, try to give me a warning first so I can get ready to... do something that might let me survive that, I guess. Finger's crossed!" >*passes mug*
>>427657 You just got tricked by my new skills in the art of disguising and my silver tongue. Now the sword is mine, and before i go, let me tell you sir, your conviction led you to your beloved, not the sword.
>>427654 >>Look at you Sugar Gorilla, all those tentacles and yet you still can't manage to hold a victory for shit in comics >But I would never say that because my love for my precious Shuma Gorath transcends time and space Fine fine, This good?
>>427651 Weird thing to say but I got it. You ever run into that treacherous, evil, backstabbing witch though, tell her to give me back my car. That's not an offensive thing to say to your people, right? Witch? It's hard enough keeping up with what's offensive on just Earth. These other dimensions are a completely new minefield.
>>427646 And who are you, the freaking help? Oh, poor little creepy old-man Jerry still feeling a little under the weather and needs an assistant? Well, you tell him this, Mr. The Butler: soon as he's lucid and perfectly capable of understanding the horrible sting of revenge the Monarch's prepared, he should prepare himself for a storm unlike he's ever witnessed. >>427648 Well, the situation with MY partner should be obvious, Not-Chris. Shake's been blessedly quiet the past few hours so I've been enjoying that immensely, but I know it is only a matter of time before he starts jamming the radio with his custom rap album again. It's been as gruesome as one can imagine. My wife, on the other hand, seems to be doing fine. She and Queen 2nd Place have just been having a grand old time without me. Apparently, the two of them got along great leading up to and after the Ms. /co/ Finals, even went out for a freaking drink afterwards. I guess Marvin and I really were taking our girls' triumph more seriously than they were at the time with that whole, interplanetary war thing.
>>427658 >"Huh. Really?" >"Shoot. I'm actually sorta let down. Wait, that sounds really bad, not that I'm bummed over you not blowing up or anything! Just got myself all psyched up for an explosion. Well, down the hatch." >"I guess nothing bad happens when you drink Wilkin's coffee. Go figure."
>>427659 Purple: Should we tell him that the cage was used, like, a lot, and for sickening things? Red: He'll find out once he realizes where that smell was coming from. Purple: But now he's going to stink up the entire tournament. Red: The staff will just have to give him a thorough cleaning. Both: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!
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>>427666 Well at least the girls are getting along. Just don't try anything to kill your partner until after this is all over. That's all for today folks, this host has got to take his beauty sleep for the big race. See you all later.
>>427667 Kill? Me? I think you got your facts wrong, toots. The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated. That's from a movie. Die Hard, I think. Now excuse me while I find those good-for-nothing janitors. I swear you leave a slimier trail than the octopus thing.
>>427667 Red: We will be waiting. >>427669 Red: Just go to hell. And uh, battle your enemy in his homeland or something. Purple: I'm getting sleepy. See you later. Red: I better get to bed too. Do not disturb us.
>>427675 >"What?! No! I didn't even know I GOT a new run on anything recently, have I been henching for that long?!" >"I thought bad things wouldn't happen if you drank Wilkins, but the curse got me anyway! Why did you betray me, coffee?!"
>>427668 That’s good at least. I was expecting something bad to happen. >>427681 Dude, it’s Marvel. You’ll get another run in like a week. Then it’ll be canceled again and the entire thing will repeat with worsening dialogue and bad art
Nyeh heh he heh heh! Brings back memories doesn't it, Muttley? Except this time, we have a bit more of a helping hand at our side. *Pushes communication button on the dashboard.* You know your orders, rotten bots! Lay the traps! Prepare the ambushes! Knock anyone you can out of the race!
>>427666 Last time I checked, my show had half a million more viewers than yours. We hit top 5 seeds so when we win, I'll be gracious enough to let you have the trophy. A deal is a deal though. No harassing you, just our opponents. Jack Spicer will be a virgin for life. Now pound it. Also, which of my albums would you like to hear?
>>427702 Don't touch me! None of you touch me! You all rejected Professor Chaos! One day next year, you all will suffer the fist of CHAOS! You will all be fisted! Ahaow! I'm going home before I get grounded.